Bellatoria: it’s…always in stock?
It’s getting to the point where I close my eyes and I can hear the sound of pizza. The slop of the sauce; the simmer of the oil; the grinding screech of pepperoni. To be clear, these are all the noises that my eyeballs make when my lids close. I swabbed my cheek and sent it in to 23 and me and they said my “blood is sauce,” and that I’m “more pizza than man” and that I should "just kill [my]self and get it over with.” Honestly, their bedside manner could use some work.
Pros:
Another Jacks-tier, filling and light.
Can alter your DNA.
Cons:
Cheese tastes a little weird, and not enough of it. (-1 point)
Crust is a little too brittle. (-1 point)
Made me take a long look at my life. (-1 point)
