The crust for this pizza is very bad. It’s high on the edges and makes it look like it could be a deep dish, but the flavor makes me think they used some kind of flour alternative. I just looked at the box and it definitely says it’s cornmeal. I’m too lazy to delete what I already wrote. Anyway, the crust with its bad taste and tendency towards roof-of-your-mouth violence wasn’t the only bad thing about this. The toppings were alright, and the cheese was cheese (can confirm!) but the sauce mixed with the cornmeal crust to make some kind of unholy witches curse that made the whole thing taste like actual depression. How can a pizza taste “sad” you ask? I don’t know, I’m not one of their pizza makers who is just phoning it in ‘til retirement. Their website no longer works, so maybe they died like so many cops in action movies, just days short of retirement.

Pros:

• I said it already but, the toppings were really good. And it had good coverage on the pizza.

Cons:

• Everything else, basically: The sauce (-2 points), the crust (-2 points), the fact that it deceived me by looking better than it tasted. (-1 point)

5/10

ironic